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26 October 2008

Encouraging Safer Sex

Attention: This entry contains information that can help you maintain a healthy, happy and rewarding life. Yea right! =P

You may already know that AIDS is caused by HIV, some Human Idiotic Immunodeficiency Virus. One of the cause is unsafe sex. Having sex without protection is risky to say the least. You could catch a Sexually Transmitted Infection (STI) and get your girlfriend pregnant. *omg shit fuuk!*

Sex? Or Safe Sex?

Starting a conversation with a partner about safer sex can be difficult. One reason many women lack confidence in asking for safer sex is that they feel that their partner's pleasure is more important than their own well-being. Oh, how thoughtful? But that's wrong!

In fact, asking for safer sex doesn't mean that you doubt his faithfulness; instead it's a health protection - a way of protecting both you and your partner.

So what if you're not ready to get pregnant and you don't wanna get infected, but you need loads of love and sex! Is there a solution?

Yes, there is!

Presenting the 2-in-1 Greatest Protection of all!

Candy?

NO! Look properly! It's...

THE CONDOM!

Cookie Monster's Condom.

"Prevents unwanted pregnancies and infections! Get 3 for just Ar-Am Nine Ninety Nine (RM9.99) a pack! Dial 1300-13-1300 now! Do call the number on your screen now! An offer not to be missed!"

Try reading it in a commercialized style. It should sound more convincing then.

Okay, back to topic. Generally, you need a constant supply of condoms and the power to request your guy to use it! Perhaps guys don't wanna suffocate their willy? Their skin needs to 'breath' too, right?

Other methods such as pills, UID, IDD prepaid cards, diaphragms, spermicide and superman can't prevent HIV. Only a condom can; with a certain success rate, which is considerably high. I think.

Anyway, here's an illustration I've made on how to put on a male condom. This could come in handy if your guy doesn't know how to install a firewall, or thinwall, on his external hard disk.

No one has ever seen this guide on the Internet before. Behold...

Kenwooi's Guide to Wear a Condom
7 Simple Steps.

As soon as your mayonnaise comes, hold the end tightly and remove the condom before your willy shrinks. Understand now? So, now you're a professional firewall installer!

Well, if reasoning and coaxing fail when you're asking for safer sex, leave him! Serves him right because he's such a dumbo! He has wasted his chance to have sex just because he didn't wanna wear a condom. Dumb!

By the way, in medical terms, safer sex refers to sexual activities that do not involve transfer of body fluids. This includes having sex with a proper use of condom.

Oh yeah, remember: sex does not always mean intercourse.

Touching.

Kissing.

Hugging.

Massaging

Masturbating.

They are also examples of safer sexual activities.

So guess what; we're all engaged in sexual activities! When you touch your friend, just tell him this: Know what, we're performing a sexual activity now! Cool isn't it?

But I advise you not to say that to a girl, unless you wanna get kicked hard right at the... never mind.

Well, that's all for now. I hope you've learned something new, because I've learned a lot from doing my research on this entry. Seriously! You'll know why in another entry. So stay tuned okay?

Oh yeah, remember to call 1300-13-1300 for enquiries.

I hope McDonald's has McCondom in the menu.

Disclaimer: kenwooi.com will not be held responsible for any unwanted babies due to unforeseen state of affairs as a result of this entry.

31 comments:

  1. Condom is useless... wat happened if it burst..... hahaha.... so make sure u where one more... double protection... lolx...

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  2. Stewpig fella..your favourite topic and area of expertise hor?

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  3. Hiyah..when d time comes n the vibes are all right..sometimes ppl tend to rush into things la. d last thing on their mind is a rubber man XD

    Eh i LOL at u last masturbating pic la..i know initially u wanted2put a pic of ur ownself playing with ur ownself right? haha!

    I'm in shanghai now btw.whasuppppppppp

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  4. condom i blow like a baloon and it wont burst!!

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  5. Man should have a condom keep in wallet as spare.

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  6. using da deodorant as a penis is darn funny!!! wahaha

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  7. LOL.. nice one.. but I wish the pictures were bigger! HOHOHO.. drop by your blog thru Innit.

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  8. Nice post. However No Sex = Safest Sex!!!

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  9. What a great post!! Very detailed.. hahaha.

    I believe everybody needs to practice safe sex.

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  10. waaaaaaaah.... nice post and educational as well... but u left out the part if condom should be applied in oral sex ?

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  11. its not only abt guys pleasure ... but also gurls ... if ur doing it with one partner den dont use a condom ... it ruins the basic feeling ... if u r not ... yea please use it ... and plz condoms ruins gurls pleasure as well :D

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  12. IDD prepaid n superman cant prevent HIV!!! LOL!!!

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  13. oh my god!!
    u r making my eyes to open widely..
    i cant believe i would read a post like this!
    you are amazing,ken!! LOL
    nice reference for mass comm students..XP

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  14. OMG KEN your blog is famous :)
    ^^ should get ken.com lol ;)

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  15. LOL! dude. did you do that deodorant photos by yourself? XD

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  16. gud thinking of using dedorant :D

    hope ppls learn from this post :D

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  17. You know what? You made me smile.

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  18. nice post bout safe sex and the instruction of condomize. Hahahaha.

    Interesting blog u have here. :)

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  19. v pro r...haha...sure v experience 1 lorr...

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  20. More pics! I demand for more pics!
    :P

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  21. i deamnd for MORE also!

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  22. omg LOL

    funny giler.. McCondom? should have asked when was in McD just now.. hahahaha..

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  23. LOL! I love your quirky writing style!

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  24. If i wasnt mistaken this would be ur second post regarding on comdom usage!!!!
    Lolz...
    U r so into it huh?
    Hahaha...
    Anyways,NICE POST BRO!!!!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete

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